Personality Testing and Effective Communication

            My boss and I have never really gotten along, even when we were just colleagues.  When she received her promotion we were even more like oil and water.  We would clash terribly and actually argue with one another, all while having the same objective in mind.  It wasn’t until I took a personality test and learned not only about myself, but how different her communication style is from mine, that I was able to change my way of thinking and approach her in the manner she needs to be communicated. 
I realized that she didn’t make me do all of those spreadsheets and re-writes of emails just to have it her way, but because she needed it that way in order for her to be able to process the information.

            I now take extra time and consideration of verbiage, layout and brevity of the message in order to ensure it is received properly.  Now, we rarely have shouting matches and have come to a point where we can talk things through in a civilized manner.  Once I changed my way of communicating, she began to see that, most of the time, we have the same goals and objectives and she is open to considering my suggestions for how to reach the goal. 

            I have been known to be blunt and tell it like it is when most others won’t.  Because of this, I usually get selected to be the voice of the group when they don’t agree with her decisions.  By changing my approach and communicating in her style, she has begun to actually appreciate me for my honesty, even in the tough situations.  I never thought that there would come a day when she would thank me for my honesty, but she recently thanked me for having the courage and professionalism to make her aware of some of her wrongdoings.  Two years ago, she would have bitten my head off and completely dismissed my comments. 

            I have realized the leaps and bounds I have made by being other-oriented with my boss could also happen by doing the same thing in my other relationships.  I need to take my communication style into consideration in my home and family life, as well as, with my friends and co-workers.  I was so miserable in my job that I knew a change had to be made with my relationship and communication with my boss.  Writing this paper made me realize that, although I don’t have strained communication with my family, it could be improved.